Fall...

Fall is an interesting Concept to me... It makes me think of the fact the circle of life. I know this sounds weird and Yes, I did just watch "The Lion King" with my sister's boyfriend... but, if you think about it... You have green trees and as they are dying their beautiful leaves turn colors or rich reds and burnt orange. Then they fall off and leave the tree, bare with all of the branches exposed. You have the fresh smell of the clean NW air whipping your hair in every which way, but as you look at the tree it is bearing all just standing tall on its own.

This may be an odd way to start a blog, but I was thinking about how Fall represents your legacy. We live, we eventually will die and all that will be left is our legacy... How we are remembered. I know that there are many people in my life that have influenced who I am and have been there through the thick and the thin. For me, I hope I have a legacy of love and caring and that I really made others feel accepted and cherished.

There are a few people at this point in my life who would leave a legacy, I only wish the emulate. My mom, my dad and my sister Lexi. Over the past two or so years, I have been up and down with my health. Through every situation, my mom and dad and sister have been by my side. They have been there to wrap their arms around me when I am sad or to laugh with me and get weak to the point where we have all lost the ability to life our own limbs. I have had nights where I have felt like I was going to get sick and even though my sister is not a fan of throwing up, she was willing to sit it out with me and be there for me if I did get sick just so I was not alone. My parents have helped me out in many ways, they allow me to live at their house and care for me and help me with doctors and sadness and the dramas of being a girl and just do life with me.

That is something that I have been thinking about. We hear that everyone wants people to "do life with" well, for me... That has been shown through the three above... Living life is being... Being present, being available, emotionally or otherwise... I want to learn from my family and when I am with others, putting down my cell phone, letting all of my cares go out the window for the time being because I want the legacy of someone that was present. Someone who was "in" all of my conversations. I want to be known as someone who loved and loved well. I know Jesus has been teaching me how to be physically, because I have not been able to just jump up and do all of the things I have missed, but I think I have missed a huge point in being present in my mind. I love, but do I always give those that I am with my whole attention and treat people like they are the most important person on the planet. Do people walk away from time with me and feel like they are as special as I know they are? If not... I am going to take the steps towards changing that.

This was kind of a ramble tonight, but I think you understand my point... and next time I may start my blog post before 1:30 am... I am probably going to read this tomorrow and find all of my mistakes and find where I did not make sense, but for tonight... I am letting it come as it wishes... Goodnight my friends... I love you all!!